Climbing the Great Wall
When hiking on a cloudy, windy day,
Careful steps one-by-one, avoiding falls.
Glued with rice and mud, dried in the sun's rays,
Slippery stones, the backbone of the Wall.
Trying to keep balanced, lunging forward,
I trip and stretch for the metal railing.
Pulling myself up from looking awkward,
I learn to move with the wind like sailing.
Twist and turns curving around and around.
Steep steps up to heaven and down to Earth.
Body shivers seeking warmth from the ground.
Legs shake, some moan, snot drips and little mirth.
From up high we see the wall far and wide,
A dragon dancing on the mountainside.
3 comments:
I like your sonnet. There are a lot of good metaphors used in it.
chloe! i mean, janice! i love the last line! it's so incredibly descriptive in so many ways, and yes, i'm still only talking about the last line. i like the rest of the poem too, of course. awesome description and everything. haha, you sure make it sound like fun. (that was sarcasm) it flows really well too. i don't really know what to improve. "pulling myself up from looking awkward" is kind of an awkward sentence, i guess. i don't know. i like it!
ingmay
Hey JANICE,
I love your sonnet. i absolutely fell in love with the word choice and the metaphors you used. i agree that you last line is beautiful. it ties everything together perfectly.
-Yulia
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